Most people who know me personally know that I'm normally a very positive person. I spend most of my time looking at the beauty of any ugly situation. When someone needs help or advice I am known for reporting the good news that comes with the bad. Need a PEP talk? I'm your girl. I apply this insight of positivity in every aspect of everyone else's lives. I cannot seem to do it for myself. When something goes wrong for me, it is devastation and I go from joyful to completely defeated in 0.5 seconds.
Today is one of those days. Its a day where the rut doesn't feel temporary. The rut is starting to ask for a mortgage payment. I've gone through so much in my life, I've made it through, I've succeeded with so many chapters of triumph. Yet its always so hard to get through it again.
I know it will be ok. It has to be. I guess once in a while we all just get tired. I'm going to take a day of rest today. Reflect. Watch movies that make me smile. Give Jackson enormous amounts of hugs and kisses and get back to my positive zone.
I really hope that everyone knows that it always gets better, as hard as it is to believe (especially on days like today for me) but it will always be ok. God never puts anything in front of us that we can't handle, its always part of our growth and our journey.
Current mood:
Im having one of my in a rut days too. It's hard when the light at the end of the tunnel seems so faint and so far away.
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